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Last Updated on Sunday, 03 January 2010 21:39
Written by Jennifer Falkfino Monday, 03 August 2009 20:39

Family & Friends - Home Life

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Another bored housewife
written by Clifford Scott Carson , August 04, 2009

Sounds to me like you just got bored with him. Another bored housewife not satisfied with what she has, thinking the grass is greener somewhere else and her "soul mate" exists elsewhere.

Great when two people can remain on "good terms" and "friends" during a break up. As long as the economics are there for the two of you, everything should be okay. The minute they're not, the tide could turn on all this "positive understanding". Where money is involved people get very funny, no matter how long they've known each other. Think it can't happen? Think again. Even the best of couples with the seemingly best intentions can turn on each other. Hopefully in your case it won't happen, but you're no where near having it behind you. There will be bumps in the road that you haven't even thought of yet, in more ways than you haven't even imagine.

As for being "successful at winning court battles against other people", that all depends. Who's suing who here? Suing another person isn't anything to gloat about, whether you did it as a "couple" or not.

In short and pardon my french (because I've been there myself) but I've heard all this horse shit before. How " I still love him, but need to evolve and move on as a person" crap. I gotta tell you, I don't really buy it. If you guys have come to a mutual agreement, great (you probably weren't meant for each other outside of making money anyway), but don't be surprised when after the "understanding period" is past, there isn't at least one person with angry resentful feelings. I'm not saying it will happen in your case, but it sounds a little too sugarcoated the way you've written it.

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Negative Nelly Strikes Again...
written by Morgan Hill , August 04, 2009

Have you ever tried to be a positive person? This women is laying her heart on the line here trying to express the way she feels about a very serious turn in her life and you basically say "Hey you, Your full of horse shit".. I mean really, that's just cold hearted. Make a new member feel welcome with a bit of compassion will you? And FYI... The court battles they won were custody cases...

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My apologies
written by Clifford Scott Carson , August 04, 2009

It was very late when I wrote that and I didn't know she was a new member. Also, this site doesn't allow for edits on comments. Moreover Morgan, I am going through a time that is extremely SERIOUS for me. Far more serious than anything she was talking about. I probably shouldn't have made a comment at all, but I'll do you a favor, I'll stop from posting anything on your site. That's probably the best thing I could do for everyone all round. Good luck to you.

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One last for Morgan
written by Clifford Scott Carson , August 04, 2009

To be quite honest, I don't think my comment was all that negative as it was realistic, okay, perhaps a bit unsympathetic. Actually, I'm going through a break up right now myself and it's not fun. A relationship I've been in for two years. I have been through divorce in the past. So I can honestly say I know what I'm talking about, I'm been there, I know. Also Morgan, unlike you, I've had relationships that lasted more than a few months. My longest was 14 years and yes, we're still friends, but that ending was difficult and painful too. ALSO Morgan, unlike you, I am a child of divorce. A bitter divorce. You're parents are still married, so what the hell do you really know about it?

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I don't need your approval
written by Jennifer Falkfino , August 04, 2009

I appreciate your thoughts, and can understand where they came from. Sometimes I need a reminder to stay grounded and even though cynical thoughts can hurt sometimes they are very necessary. Thank you for the reminder, but keep in mind that I am also hearing that from everyone else.
I have never been through a divorce before myself, but I am very familiar with the process. My parents are divorced and both of them are remarried. Also, the court battles I mentioned before were custody cases that I helped my husband with. I fought very hard to be sure those two girls were able to see their father because that's what was right. I have seen a very nasty ugly side of proceedings. Between my parents and his two girls about $65,000 went right down the lawyer drain.
It's sick and mean and no one wins. I know very well that things can go sour easily and even if we can't stay friends forever I don't intend on hurting him. I don't want much anyway.
What I am definitely walking away with is the strong person that I have grown into and if I were to allow myself to become vindictive or mean I would be giving that up. He and I both agree that those are only signs of weakness. I also believe that all the talk about "just be careful, they will turn on you" is another way for people to boost their own self esteem. After all, if I could be nice and you couldn't it would show who the weaker being is, correct?
I don't know your situation, and can't pretend to give you advice on something I haven't exactly been through. I wish you the best in your breakup. I know it's hard.

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...
written by Clifford Scott Carson , August 07, 2009

Yeah well, I suppose you are hearing that from everyone else. One thing I don't like is when I say something to someone that they've overly aware of. There's so much misunderstanding going on everywhere. I don't like the part about the attorney's getting $65,000 dollars. What a waste that is and for what? Because two parties cannot work out there differences on their own? The thing about law enforcement, the media and society in general is that they encourage people to go to court. It's all about money and law enforcement, the courts and attorney's getting everyone's cash. In America, the message is two parties can't work out their differences without attorney's and courts. Cops encourage average citizens to file charges against other people rather than seeking other alternatives. Television programs glamorize court proceedings. I've been a defendant in a court case that dragged on and on over a long period of time, one extension after another. It was miserable. Nothing glamorous or fun about it.
What's worse are people who are "professionals" at suing other people? Professional suers. They make it their life's work to find matters to sue other people over. That is REALLY anger producing. I knew this woman who was having financial difficulties and slipped in a parking lot. It wasn't that serious. In fact, she got up and went to a pay phone to call 911. Rather than taking personal responsibility for her fall, she sued the store. In the end all she got was about $5000 dollars, but she would never have taken it to the level that she did if she hadn't been in dire financial straights.

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So much for proof reading
written by Clifford Scott Carson , August 07, 2009

Alot of mistakes in that last post. Why can't one edit responses on this thing?

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